Today I realized something. It might seem like a small something, but to me it didn't feel so small at the time, because sometimes it's the small things that make me miss my husband the most. I had a busy day today, which is rare for me as of late. I've been trying to "take it easy" over these past couple weeks, to give my brain and my body time to heal themselves.
But today I had to make a doctor's appointment, a stop at the office, a couple trips to drop off fundraiser items, a shopping trip (and anyone who knows me knows I HATE shopping...I like to buy things, but I hate to shop) to find the boys new winter coats, a trip to the pumpkin patch and a trip to the grocery store. For being so good while we were out running errands (and by "so good", I mean only minor physical altercations and arguments, no public knock down/drag outs and no screaming matches in public), I told the boys we could buy Captain America, which just came out on DVD yesterday, and have a movie and pizza night after we got done decorating our pumpkins.
I've always been a bit of a Marvel nerd, and Captain America has always been my favorite, since long before I had my very own soldier. So I was stoked for this movie. I remember taking the boys to see it as soon as it came out. They loved it, but I definitely think I enjoyed it more. I remember wishing that my husband had been here to go see it with us. And I remember that the war scenes made me sick to my stomach, because the movie came out not too long after my husband left for Iraq.
And then I realized...this movie that didn't come out in theaters until after my husband had left was already out on DVD...and my husband is still gone. In the grand scheme of things, missing the theatrical and DVD release of a cheesy action movie doesn't really even register on the chart. My husband has missed birthdays, anniversaries, sporting events, and will most likely miss the holidays this year.
But still....it reminded me just how long he's actually been gone. And while that's a hard thing to think about, it also means he's that much closer to coming home. His deployment is more than halfway over. Which means that he'll most definitely be home before Captain America makes it's broadcast television debut. And that's a good thing.
We are the silent ranks. We each have a story. This is mine.
